After The Break

Hello dear viewers, after a couple weeks holiday doing work I am back. Well actually still late by 4 days as I started this 4 days ago.

Unfortunately this means that I have a few things I would like to say and not enough energy to type it all. So without further waffling let’s get started.

Politiking in the office.

All thanks to our comrades and our socialist office structure we are now being faced with the classic animal farm scenario of Napoléon being more equal than others. In fact I believe most people are more equal than me.

Please don’t think I am at all jealous at being the humble comrade that sits around drinking vodka day in and day out. I like being at the bottom of the pile as it gives me the possibility to mooch about and be ‘hip and cool’.

What worries me is that I am like the horse at the end of its useful life, rather than be let free to roam amongst the pastures to enjoy my reward for working so much, I have a sneaky suspicion that it’s to the glue factory for this one.

Of course the glue will help other worker bees’ lives but invariably it will profit only the king of the hill. All the best will in the world won’t save me from that fate when it happens. Time to look to the green grass on the other side me thinks.

Fanboys.

Yes there are those that believe that they item/ product/ thing is the best in the world and no matter what happens, this religion sticks with them. I say religion because that’s what it is, a cult may be more appropriate.

I won’t point fingers but a person who shall remain nameless has discovered joy in a specific product, the irony is that I agree with him, but on principle must provide the argument against. Their endless enthusiasm although justified just shows the change in culture towards our traditions.

We all have worked so hard to get where we are today and risk the millions invested in R&D be thrown away because someone made it better. Just like the Japanese at the end of world war two started copying the American camera’s and give or take 15 years made better products that they ever could the same is happening in our world. This time it’s the Japanese and oh the Americans and China who are slugging it out.

What is more amusing is that they are competing using the same base for all the products. Items built from the same components and which serve the same ultimate purpose. So fanboys, be warned you are only fuelling the economy of the big three, our empire has been reduced to two dozen lumps of coal where once we ruled the oceans, and actually most of the world; it is all your fault. You have sold yourselves for the cheapest instant gratification.

Opera.

This is something that means a lot to me, having been de-virginized to the joy of opera a few weeks ago. It’s not a cheap hobby, but having been once the ENO (English National Opera) have now decided to spam me with special offers so tickets that retail at 70-100 GBP can now be had for 15. Which in the grand scheme of things is great, not that we mind paying full price but if the show is not full why not sell the rest of the seats of cheap?

This is a model airlines used to follow many moons ago, it always meant that they had full planes. These days however they sell cheap if you book months in advance but very expensive if it is last minute. Therefore losing my business and anyone else’s who is spontaneous.

I digress, if you have never been then go, it is worth doing at least once in your life. It shows us how tragedy can make people happier. Forget Hollywood and Disney endings, the only purpose of those is to make you return to watch more and drown in the fantasy of impossible romance, which in the end just makes you sad because it shows you what you can never have.

However opera and tragedy shows you how much worse it could be for you and therefore by association how you don’t really have it that bad. Think about it, would you prefer to aspire to something that is not real or be happy that what you have is so much better than everyone else. Humans are selfish…. We want to be special.

*waves arms*

A big up to da man who sells da restora mojo juice! Yousa be knowing who you is!

*thumbs down*

To my basic package product who changes the rules and wont write for me when I go away and therefore leads to customer service issues.

*hugs*

For all the crazy friends who seem to think that polishing wooden floors is an activity that you share with you friends after bribing them with wine and good food.

Signing off

Lemon Tree Man