Is It Really Time?

After having spent the weekend helping out everyone I could get my hands on and then using what little time was left to do house related stuff I find myself stuck on a Sunday night asking myself what I did for myself. You know in that utterly selfish way where the little voices in our heads tell us to be selfish and that we are number 1 and only the I matters.

Having many I’s in my head, I find it quite hard to do the selfish thing, as one may imagines the Is do not agree with each other ever.

But this is why we have a conscience, a part of one who is capable of making us have feelings, such as joy and more often than not guilt. Guilt is an interesting feeling, it’s not good or bad, you can feel guilt about doing the right thing, you can feel guilt for being a cock; it’s an emotional response that turns anything into a negative feeling.

Why do all humans want a conscience then? Why do we want to have this negative feeling? It makes you feel rotten and depressed and tired and all you get is sad apathy. Just like every other Monday morning when you fight the hordes of children on their way to school, stand in a sardine can for an hour, wait 10 minutes for your lift, walk into the office with a plastic smile and get told of for being late despite being on time, to sit down on your ‘ergonomic ‘ chair which leaves you looking like a crippled hunchback at the end of the day and try to tan while looking at your PC screen.

Don’t get me wrong I like my office; it’s vibrant and coloured with a whole pile of morons that provide entertainment. Not entertainment that I would share with you dear readers but entertainment none the less.

Still another 5 days of tedium for a 2 days of doing everything for everyone else and ensuring that my roof does not collapse on my head due to neglect. Where is the good deal in that; my dear readers I am sure you all have exciting lives with great adventures. But I; no, it’s not allowed, even if temped to pack a bag and bugger off to some exotic place, Morecambe as an example, my conscience would make me feel so guilty that I would shrivel up and throw myself into the sea in order to become lobster bait.

So all in all as a summary to the weekend, the only silver lining is I managed to have one pleasant evening ensuring a friends lack of sobriety and as a consequence ensuring that I drink myself into becoming blind to everything and washing that stupid conscience away for a few hours.

So dear reader, if you have a conscience, please get rid of it, it will only hold you back and make you miserable.

Signing Off

Lemon Tree Man